Survive or Thrive

Survive or Thrive

What is the story you’re holding onto (and what is the impact)?

My love for language and more importantly the impact of language on our bodies and emotions is just one of the loves of my life (meaningful conversation, travel, my girl tribe and bubbles are few of the others).

And given that this is my first blog of 2019 I thought I’d share that love with you again, with the hope and desire that you create a 2019 of your dreams!

I was watching a documentary last night and if truth be told I was starting to doze off (it was close to midnight) but it hit me like a lightning bolt!

A woman was being interviewed, and through her sobs I heard her say: “Who will I be if this cancer is cured?  I have lived with it for so long, it is me, it is who I am”.

What?

Thank heavens for stop-rewind.  I was awake. Wide awake. I had to replay that segment.

Yip, that’s what she said.

The profundity of what she said was not lost on me.

Consider it for a moment.  She was saying that her identity in the world had became that of having cancer.  That everyone knew her as “Alice, the woman with cancer”; or “Alice my wife who has cancer”.

Alice, the woman with cancer

Alice herself had disappeared and the cancer was now the person, the identity.

And more than that, her fear was that she would no longer have ‘the crutch’; no longer have her raison d’être.

When she imagined her life or the simple act of speaking of herself, she no longer would have ‘cancer’ to explain her being, the reason why she looked poorly that day, or how cancer had consumed her life and the life of her family.

And that’s exactly what happened.

Her language and her emotional reaction to her cancer had literally joined forces to consume her.

Our language has a direct impact on our emotions and our bodies.

Take these two sentences:

  1. All I want for 2019 is to survive
  2. All I want for 2019 is to thrive

In the former example, our bodies immediately go into a flight or fight stance because of the vibration of the word ‘survive’ and then our unconscious engagement with life and every day is that of having to ensure our survival.  We might speak of having to fight for what is ours. Or how tough life is. How this year is going to break so many people.

And in the latter example, our bodies are in a place of delight. We hold an unconscious belief that 2019 is going to be a ‘soaring’ year.  A year where we flourish, where the gardens of our lives are lush and there is an abundance of whatever it is that we need, dream and desire.

What story (stories) are you currently holding onto?  And what is the impact?

Are you leaning to ‘surviving’ or ‘thriving’?

I hear too often “I have no choice” or “It’s no use”.

Dammit people sit up.  Pay attention to your language.

Stop – rewind.

Start again!

Make your words count.  Let your language love you.

For further reading:

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/12/the-book-of-human-emotions-language-feelings/420978/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/words-can-change-your-brain/201208/the-most-dangerous-word-in-the-world